Today we can choose to move into the light that person left behind and live a life they would be proud of. We can tell the truth, show up for our friends and family authentically and fulfill our obligations.
We can be kind to others, smile at strangers and help the homeless. We can embody everything that person we miss dearly did on a daily basis and never took credit for. I think it is up to us to carry on living rather than despairing in what could have been. We may continue to miss them, but please remember: they would want us to live a life worth living. We want to hear your story. Become a Mighty contributor here.
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Submit a Story. Join Us Log In. Grieving is both mentally and physically tiring.
Famous Quotes To Inspire | MyGriefAssist
When you feel you can't take anymore, back off. Get rest; eat well, and cancel or reschedule what appointments you can. Don't isolate. All you may want to do right now is to shut everyone out, but this would be counter-productive.
Instead, have a modified "open door policy": allow caring, compassionate people into your life, but exclude those who are less able to be the kind of support you need now. And remember, when you need to take a time out, it's really okay to lock your door so you can rest. Use ritual to make your grieving a sacred experience. Personal rituals which engage the senses—such as the lighting of a candle, beginning or ending the day with a calming yoga practice, journaling or other creative endeavors, even the ritualized use of essential oils—do much to affirm the sacred nature of the transition you're going though as well as affirm the otherworldly connection you still have with the deceased.
Turn to your faith.
If you have a religious background, this is not the time to neglect your spirituality. While the death of your loved one may cause you to doubt your beliefs for a time, or even force you to change your beliefs based on what you've experienced; revisiting your spiritual training can be useful to you right now.
The Stages of Healing from Grief
Find significance and meaning in your loved one's death. You'll never be able to answer all the questions you have like "Why did this have to happen? Hang on to your memories, but don't cling to them. The past is gone and it's not smart to dwell on it.
But the memories you have of your loved one can fuel your grief work. Don't let your memories fade; document each of them, either using a journal or a handheld digital recorder. It doesn't matter the exact nature of your loss: whether it's the loss of a job, the end of a marriage, or the death of someone dear; the healing—the coming back—is hard.
You've got to keep your focus on grieving attentively and purposefully, at a time when you're exhausted. Nineteenth-century English author Mary Ann Evans, who wrote under the pen-name George Eliot, described the work of grieving this way:. We think it both accurately describes the goal in grieving: to become comfortable with the "now" experience of loss as well recognizing how grief as an ally Grieving requires you to accept the perfection of the status quo. As Valery Satterwhite wrote, it's important to "know that everything is in perfect order whether you understand it or not" Source: Goodreads.
It's also valuable to remain expectant of good things happening to you, including relief from the hour-to-hour suffering of bereavement. When you're having a difficult day, recall these words, from Sarah Ban Breathnach, author of Simple Abundance: A Yearbook of Comfort and Joy : "Today expect something good to happen to you no matter what occurred yesterday.
Saying GoodbyeA Long Process. Anger Revisited. Changing Perspective. The Spiritual Sojourn. The Persistent Call of Home. Echoes of Divorce. Slowfading Regrets.